One sentence stories or flash fiction are near and dear to my heart, both literally and figuratively. In December 2007, I had Ernest Hemingway's shortest story tattooed on my chest. (Yes, I know there is controversy surrounding the attribution to Hemingway and the story behind its creation.)
So, the challenge to write one-sentence synopses of our relationship is just too good to refuse. Here ya go, baby!
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I've found the key to my girlfriend's heart is a good meal and a bottle of wine and, as it turns out, she has the same lock on her panties.
I had to wonder what Meg had been telling her when her mom commented astonishedly "well, Nicole is nice".
My cheeks blushed and I sank a little lower in my seat when Meg flippantly commented 'nice tie' totally unaware that her cheeks were aflame for an entirely different reason.
Pinned to the floor and laughing, Meg suddenly recalled the answer to my question.
I felt a personal loss when I learned I could never meet the woman who had so shaped my girlfriend's life, but I know that through Meg I know Gayle firsthand.
Pete and Repeat sat on a fence, Pete fell off, who's left, repeat is all I hear sometimes when my girlfriend is telling a story.
I knew when we climbed the monument stairs that I would tell you I loved you and I know we were both floating all the way back down, and ever since.
Thrown to the wolves, Meg put on a red sweater and a smile and won over every friend I have in one night.
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I've found the key to my girlfriend's heart is a good meal and a bottle of wine and, as it turns out, she has the same lock on her panties.
I had to wonder what Meg had been telling her when her mom commented astonishedly "well, Nicole is nice".
My cheeks blushed and I sank a little lower in my seat when Meg flippantly commented 'nice tie' totally unaware that her cheeks were aflame for an entirely different reason.
Pinned to the floor and laughing, Meg suddenly recalled the answer to my question.
I felt a personal loss when I learned I could never meet the woman who had so shaped my girlfriend's life, but I know that through Meg I know Gayle firsthand.
Pete and Repeat sat on a fence, Pete fell off, who's left, repeat is all I hear sometimes when my girlfriend is telling a story.
I knew when we climbed the monument stairs that I would tell you I loved you and I know we were both floating all the way back down, and ever since.
Thrown to the wolves, Meg put on a red sweater and a smile and won over every friend I have in one night.
As I stood salvaging what I could of the burnt bacon, I knew that I had signed up for a lifetime in the kitchen.
I think my girlfriend would agree that the best advice she's ever been given is to "pay attention to that".
I could only laugh and shake my head as Heather surveyed my bruises and exclaimed 'damn, I didn't know Meg had it in her!".
Our first kissed tasted like tears but I was already thinking about calling her the next day.
Who knew you could fall more deeply in love listening to your girlfriend proudly match NFL cities and mascots?
Work, Lily, chores, friends, family, bills, volunteering, eating, sleeping, exercising; all things that interfere with cuddle time.
We hit a new stage in our relationship when I propped my leg up on the bathroom sink in front of her for the first time.
It didn't cost me much, but that Facebook ring was the best investment of my life.
When I heard "I was left for a punctuation mark", I saw with absolute clarity Meg's history as a fag hag.
I'm just glad I don't have to give her $5 every time I feel I'm home.
There was something about the way the lights in the lot shined on Meg's wild eyes that would have made even Bob Evans' biscuits rise.
It made no sense for me not to drive Heather home that night, but we both knew what was coming before the elevator doors even opened.
Surrounded by fireworks, patriotic music and the scatterings of a picnic, I couldn't help but reach out to touch her hand.
She warned me that her stepfather wouldn't talk much an hour before I sat listening to a story about his childhood and as she realized, yet again, that she had underestimated my charm.
I never want to go 24 hours without talking to her ever again.
You realize quickly how weird your life is while sitting at your ex-girlfriend's parents house with her boyfriend and your new girlfriend eating cinnamon rolls.
Begging for it, I nearly came when she told me she'd turn me over when she was ready.
My best friend cut right to the chase when she told me to 'get my head out of my ass and date Meg, you dumb fuck".
I worry about our ability to retire based on our total investment in washrags.
Pulling up your pants in a cop's spotlight is not a good way to impress a girl, but neither is not telling anyone a cop was coming.
The drive flew by as I sat contentedly listening to the I <3 NC playlist on her iPod.
The most romantic text I've received told me she loved me more than "any other motherfucker out there".
**********************
Ok, that was fun. Meg may or not be inspired to add some...I hope she does.
I think my girlfriend would agree that the best advice she's ever been given is to "pay attention to that".
I could only laugh and shake my head as Heather surveyed my bruises and exclaimed 'damn, I didn't know Meg had it in her!".
Our first kissed tasted like tears but I was already thinking about calling her the next day.
Who knew you could fall more deeply in love listening to your girlfriend proudly match NFL cities and mascots?
Work, Lily, chores, friends, family, bills, volunteering, eating, sleeping, exercising; all things that interfere with cuddle time.
We hit a new stage in our relationship when I propped my leg up on the bathroom sink in front of her for the first time.
It didn't cost me much, but that Facebook ring was the best investment of my life.
When I heard "I was left for a punctuation mark", I saw with absolute clarity Meg's history as a fag hag.
I'm just glad I don't have to give her $5 every time I feel I'm home.
There was something about the way the lights in the lot shined on Meg's wild eyes that would have made even Bob Evans' biscuits rise.
It made no sense for me not to drive Heather home that night, but we both knew what was coming before the elevator doors even opened.
Surrounded by fireworks, patriotic music and the scatterings of a picnic, I couldn't help but reach out to touch her hand.
She warned me that her stepfather wouldn't talk much an hour before I sat listening to a story about his childhood and as she realized, yet again, that she had underestimated my charm.
I never want to go 24 hours without talking to her ever again.
You realize quickly how weird your life is while sitting at your ex-girlfriend's parents house with her boyfriend and your new girlfriend eating cinnamon rolls.
Begging for it, I nearly came when she told me she'd turn me over when she was ready.
My best friend cut right to the chase when she told me to 'get my head out of my ass and date Meg, you dumb fuck".
I worry about our ability to retire based on our total investment in washrags.
Pulling up your pants in a cop's spotlight is not a good way to impress a girl, but neither is not telling anyone a cop was coming.
The drive flew by as I sat contentedly listening to the I <3 NC playlist on her iPod.
The most romantic text I've received told me she loved me more than "any other motherfucker out there".
**********************
Ok, that was fun. Meg may or not be inspired to add some...I hope she does.
10 comments:
I knew the first time I craved Mexican food, that you were someone special.
That night I felt fear, but your green brown eyes told me it would all be okay.
Although it confuses me every time, I still find 'weird Nicole head' endearing.
It didn't make sense for you not to drive Heather home that night, nor was it right for you to have to sleep on the couch, but somehow in the end, it all turned out alright.
I never imagined having a burnt orange bedroom, but now I can't wait.
I'm glad that when you didn't want to wander the mall that day, you weren't really done with me.
You promised to always be my raincoat, and you've never let me down.
I've never been a camper, but you make "you, me, a tent, a tree" sound like the best weekend two people could have.
I would take a month of vacation just to have nonstop cuddle time.
I was sure we were doomed the day I asked who Eric Jeter was, but now I know that I'll only get a chuckle when I ask about halftimes in basketball.
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